(Editor’s Note: This post is part of a monthly feature in which Ryan takes an actual letter written to “Dear Abby” and answers it himself. For further background see the introductory post here, or maybe also here. Please note that however insightful and strangely arousing his advice may be, the views expressed below are those of him alone, and do not necessarily reflect those of The Wheelhouse Review, its parent and subsidiary companies, or its minions of unpaid and overworked interns. Ryan is neither a licensed lifestyle columnist nor fully housetrained. Also, even though he’s totally awesome and can do like a million push-ups, he definitely didn’t write this intro.)
This month’s letter was published on May 26, 2012, and quoted in full, reads as follows:
DEAR ABBY: My friends and I are women in our late 40s and early 50s. Some of us are married, some are single. Individually or as a group we have taken classes, volunteered, gone on cruises, gone to clubs and bars — you name it.
We have noticed that nearly everyone at these activities is either female or with a female as part of a couple. There are loads of single middle-aged women out there joining things and having fun, but there seem to be almost no single middle-aged men. Friends in various parts of the country report the same thing.
Where do the single men go? They rarely go out alone or with a male buddy. Our running joke is they’re all home watching bad cable TV. Middle-aged guys must be there somewhere, but where? You’d think that if they wanted to meet women, they’d go where women are, but we rarely see them. Can you solve this mystery for us? — WHERE THE BOYS AREN’T, NORTHERN WYOMING
Go ahead and read “Abby’s” advice if you want (same link, or maybe it’s this one), but basically she’s all: don’t go to clubs and bars because that’s where men go to pick up younger girls (duh), try not to “hunt in packs” because it can intimidate guys (partly true: depends on the size and attack formation of said packs), and maybe you should try online dating (gee thanks, Abby, I hadn’t noticed the millions of pop-up ads I’ve been barraged with for online dating and “adult chat” sites. If I click on one do you think I’ll win a free iPad too?). Talk about mailing it in. Here’s my much better, far more practical advice.