If you’re a longtime reader, short time stalker, and/or part-time lover, you know I’m bursting with inventions like Thomas Edison on speed. So I humbly present to you my latest in a series of unpatented, non-FDA approved inventions: the man shawl.
It’s been so long since your last invention. I’ve been waiting with bated breath. What is it?
Bate your breath no longer, my impatient friend. Today I’m glad to unveil the next in my series of breath de-bating inventions. But let me respond to your question with one of my own: wasn’t it hot outside today?
Sort of. I mean, it’s September now. It was a lot hotter in August.
Whatever, your mom was a lot hotter in August. I had stuff going on then. Are you going to play along or what?
Sorry, sir. Yes, it was a scorcher outside today!
Damn straight it was. Almost suspiciously hot if you ask me….
Please, go on. I’m all ears.
Picture from menwhoknit.com
Don’t hurry me, Captain Idiom. Now let me ask you this: you are a male, correct?
And then some!
As am I, brother, as am I. Now what, pray tell, is the worst part about being a male in the hot summer months?
Having a greater statistical likelihood than a woman of obtaining a senior management position in any given company, irrespective of job sectors?
You know, sometimes I wonder why I ever bother….
Sorry, sorry. I don’t know. What is it?
The hardest part about being a male in the hot summer months is fashion.
Preach! I tell you, I really thought this was the year cargo shorts were making a comeback.
One problem at a time, nerd. What I mean is that like my previous Greatest Invention of All Time, Work Chaps, we have to balance weather-related clothing preferences with Human Resource-related dress standards.
I like work chaps.
Me too. And this invention is basically the opposite of work chaps. Except it doesn’t involve chaps and is totally different. Continue reading